Something Different This Time Though

 It's time to stop looking at the Covid dashboard. This pandemic will go on for a long time. The virus will be with us forever, but what will become of my day to day life? What will teaching look like in the fall? What will school be like for my children? It's exciting to see S read. It's exciting that he enjoys reading. It's one of the main pleasures of life for me. 

Where does that zeal come from that I was expressing in the Earth President script idea to destroy humanity and start over. A demilitarized zone where the animals can come back. Nature is healing. Chernobyl. Each death and each Covid case represents a web of relationships that have been permanently changed. Orphans. For some there is nowhere to go for advice, comfort and love. Now the P's are getting bombed by the I's once again. 

How can I's who were killed throughout history become the killers now? Short memories. Trauma. The nature of human beings. I've seen immigrants hating other immigrants for being immigrants. 

C is finishing up her Master's. Thank god. The debts we have continue to get paid. The American government continues to be imperialist. The American military continues to repress local movements. There is something different this time though. There is more in the media about the P's perspective. Social media can't be fully censored. Bits of truth are sneaking in. Slipping by. 

I haven't had a good talk with my parents in a while. I'm afraid to invite them up, especially now with what's happened in the family. Hope P is ok. He hasn't called me back and I haven't talked to him in a while. I know he's looking for a teaching job again. 

Teaching is a great job. I have so many unread books but it makes me happy to see them all lined up. I like to take them down and organize them. Straighten them so I can look at all the titles. My curiosity about the world has never dimmed. I continue to seek out new music. 

FDR's Bill of Rights. Clean Water. A clean environment. California is trying out a guaranteed income. You don't have freedom in our current system because you are indebted and you're too exhausted to enjoy your life. Too exhausted to enjoy your kids. I feel lucky to be a teacher. To have a union. To have medical and dental care and retirement.